It’s Good to Talk to Strangers

Every time I go to Trader Joe’s, the checker asks me what I’m up to that day. Honestly, it drives me nuts because the answer is usually extremely uninteresting but I feel like they are hoping I’ll say something really cool. Usually, I push back. And like a petulant child, my response is something like, “Errands.” And then I put up “Cold Adriana Face” and get my too-many-snacks and leave.

But. Sometimes I break character. Instead of acting like I don’t like people, I engage and tell the truth. Or even Truth Plus. Like “Well I was going to go back to work, but you know what? I think I’m gonna ditch it and take all these snacks and fun wines I bought but didn’t need down to the river and play hooky. What’s your favorite spot nearby?” And suddenly, Trader Joe’s Guy is no longer the enemy but the dude whose day I made by not being boring.

So what does this have to do with public speaking? It turns out that one of the easiest, and lowest stakes ways to practice getting comfortable speaking in front of strangers is… drum roll please… talking to strangers! And where better to get 3 mins of practice in than at the grocery store, coffee shop, waiting for the dentist to call you in, etc.? You can say pretty much whatever you want to someone you’ll only ever talk to for a hot second. 

The best part? You realize that talking to strangers isn’t really a big deal. You teach your nervous system and your subconscious mind that you are safe when opening your mouth to communicate. 

As the sign on my fridge says “Practice Makes Progress.”

Try it out, and let me know what you think. (Also bonus points for letting me in on the secret of your favorite TJ’s snack.)

Want to hear me talk about this tool (and a bunch more) in more depth? Check out this episode of the Screw Being Unhappy podcast with Zuzana Mukumayi.